Throughout our lives, in each area of our lives, and from an infinite variety of sources, we learn lessons.

Lessons educate us, move us toward or away from something, support or change the trajectory of our lives.

We learn some lessons ‘the hard way’ and some ‘the easy way’.

Lessons are learned from any person, any experience, at any time.

Lessons can be fully learned in the moment and last a lifetime, learned over a period of time, or continue to evolve throughout our lifetime.

When my life was transformed through a lesson that revealed itself to me while caring for my Dad with his diagnosis of a type of Dementia, I began intentionally revisiting lessons throughout my life for the additional layers they had for me that I wasn’t aware of at the time.

The lesson that revealed itself to me with my Dad is massive acceptance and radical presence. Massive acceptance is accepting exactly what is in the moment. I don’t have to like it, understand it, or agree with it. I just have to accept it 100% – and without judgment. With that, I can be fully – radically – present in the moment, make the wisest choices in even the most challenging experiences, and experience joy in the tiniest moments.

One of the most powerful lessons waiting for me from that experience has been while I still experience each emotion, now I’m feeling the emotion that actually matches the experience, not the emotion fueled by judgment. Through this, I move forward from the experience and can see the lessons in it instead of constantly judging myself as not enough in some way and missing out on valuable lessons for me – and often for others. I learned with our perfectly imperfect life journeys – especially those when we don’t have a reference reservoir of experience – giving ourselves grace that we’re doing our best opens us up to exploring what else is possible from a place of curiosity, not the self-judgment of failure.

Here’s an example in a completely different area, where a lesson I was taught in my very early years recently revealed something more for me.

As a young child, my mom taught me: “If you can take it off the hanger, you can put it back on.” This was taught for me at home so I respected my clothes. I hung them up or folded them and put them where they belonged. It was taught this at the store when I tried clothes on so I respected the clothes and the employees. No one had to pick up after me. It’s a lesson that lasts for me today.

I was recently at a ‘big box’ store. I’d gotten a phone call so I’d stopped at the side of an aisle and was looking across at tables that had neatly folded clothes on them. One table had items for men, and another had items for women. I watched as people walked up, picked up an item, opened it up to see if they liked it and, if not, dropped it on the table. Even after my call ended, I stayed to watch the phenomenon. I decided to wait until 30 men and 30 women looked at the clothes on the tables. I wish I could say I was shocked that not one of the 60 people made an attempt to fold the items they didn’t put in their cart. This happened in less than half an hour.

It was like my mom’s lesson was having a deja vu for me. Throughout my life the lesson has meant to me respecting my parents, the clothes, and the store employees. The powerful lesson for me that day is it’s also about respecting ourselves. Cause and effect. The effect is mindlessly dropping clothes on a table. The cause is not intentionally respecting ourselves enough to choose to do what we know is the right thing – even if someone doesn’t tell us to.

What lessons in your life have continued to develop meaning for you?